Well Blake is just over two weeks old and we are enjoying everything about him! He's gained a little weight, at 16 days old he is 8lbs 7.5oz! It's hard to believe that just two weeks ago we were anticipating his arrival. So I promised in my last blog post that I would post his birth story, so here it is:
December 16th, 2012 Rowdy and I had been busy all morning trying to get things together before we left for the hospital. I was emotional, upset that nothing had gone to plan thus far, nervous about needing pitocin and what it was going to be like, if my baby would handle everything okay, etc. We went and had "linner" over at Rowdy's parents house and then Rowdy, Lacey and I left for the hospital. We got there and checked in at 4pm, and got settled in our room. The nurse said that we would be lucky if the baby came by Tuesday. TUESDAY? We were all a little surprised and a little let down that we would have to wait that long. The nurse said that we should set a goal for that night and since my doctor had suggested I get lots of sleep the night before they start pitocin because the chances of me going into labor from cervidil were minimal, I made sleep my goal. At 6:15pm she started the cervidil and within about a half hour I noticed that my contractions had started to increase in number and intensity, but I didn't allow myself to get too excited yet.
Lacey left to go get us some food and a couple more things we had forgotten at home. Rowdy and I enjoyed some fruit from room service before she dropped off Burger King. Lacey said that she was going to go home unless I felt I would be going into labor that night but since my contractions weren't painful, we sent her home at 8:30 to get a good nights sleep before all the action the following day. The nurse came in and noticed I was eating a burger and fries, she smiled, "You know, I would go easy on what you eat, what goes down is likely to come back up later" but I wasn't too concerned considering she said that we would be lucky if he came by Tuesday. Not long afterwards I started to have stronger contractions, and they were about every 4 minutes consistently. The nurse came in to check on me and saw the monitor and told me that it looked like I went into labor on my own and that this was a good thing. She said that the spikes of my contractions were not accurate, that because I didn't have any internal monitors, what looks like a small contraction on the screen could very well be a huge one.
By 9:30pm, I was in full blown, hard labor, having painful, strong contractions every 3 minutes lasting 60-90 seconds each. We called Lacey and told her what was going on and she rushed back. I asked the nurse if I would still need pitocin, she assured me there was definitely no need for it anymore. My contractions continued to get stronger and harder to handle. I rocked on the birthing ball, leaned and rocked over the bed and even tried to walk, but walking was not much of an option seeing that I could only get about three doors down the hall before another contraction would come on and render me unable to walk. Rowdy was a rockstar, holding me, breathing with me, massaging my back and helping me in anyway possible. By 10pm, I was in so much pain, I wanted my mom. So I told Rowdy to call her and Jordanna, my doula up. When my mom got there I just cried and leaned into her, I was so grateful she was there with me. My dad and Jordanna came up shortly after.
By 11pm I was asking about an epidural, but Rowdy and Jordanna tried to keep me on track with my natural childbirth that I wanted so badly. We decided to put the birthing ball in the hot shower and Rowdy got in with me and massaged my back. I rocked back and forth, moaning as each contraction would peek and go back down. I was later told that it was quite entertaining listening to me, between contractions, I would say different things like: "You have no idea how much pain I am in!" or one time Rowdy asked me if I still wanted 4 kids, my response "No, we are only having one! We will adopt the rest" and "When is this contraction going to end!" My dad wanted to record my rantings. I can honestly say, while I was in the shower, I thought about my son, how much I loved him and how much pain I was feeling, but I wanted so badly to give him the safest, unmedicated birth possible. I also thought about my Savior, how he suffered so much for me, how he knew everything I was going through because he had experienced all pain. I know that's not always something women think about while in labor, but I sure did. I thought about how much He must really love me to go through that much pain.
By 1am I was really wanting to end the pain so the nurse checked me and said I was 3cm, "That's it? Are you kidding me?!" I felt defeated considering I was in SO much pain, I was sure I had to be at least at a 5. She pulled the cervidil out and recommended I try the whirlpool tub. I got in and tried that and was not a fan, after about 20 minutes I was done. It was getting extremely intense. "I am not kidding, I want an epidural, somebody listen to me, I want an epidural!" Rowdy and Jordanna could tell I was serious and went and got the nurse. I honestly cannot describe the pain I felt, it is the most intense experience I have ever had. They got me into my room, "Somebody, anybody, call the anesthesiologist!!!" I was desperate. They started me on the fluids I would need for an epidural, I was crying, "Does it really take two hours for the person to get here?" The nurse laughed a little, "No honey, he will be here in about ten minutes." Thank goodness! She checked me just before he arrived and I was at 5cm. She told me that my body was acting as if I was in transition and that once I got the epidural, my body would likely to catch up in dilation with how it was physically feeling. She also said that only one person could be in the room for the 45 minute procedure. I about had a heart attack, "I have to sit still during contractions for 45 minutes?!" This was a huge concern because sitting still was the last thing I wanted to do while having a contraction. Luckily she said that I only had to sit still for about ten minutes, I could try to manage that. Just before the anesthesiologist came in, I had one massive contraction and it was the only one I actually screamed during.
At 3am the miracle worker, named Toby came in and started doing what he did best, relieving pain. Rowdy stood in front of me and held my weight as I leaned into him. Poor guy had to sit down after a few minutes because he almost passed out from locking his knees and me breathing in his face. Heavenly Father must have had pity on me because the three contractions I had during the period I had to sit still were manageable. They were not nearly as painful as the others I had before. I was so grateful for this. After that, they started the medicine and got me comfortable in bed and life seemed like heaven at that point. They left us alone so we could rest, Rowdy fell asleep for a bit but I was so anxious and excited that I couldn't sleep, only rest.
At 5am they came in and checked me, I was at an 8. Woo! Almost there! Then at 5:30am two nurses rushed in, "The baby's heart rate has dropped significantly, its at 66bpm and it wont go back up, we might have to take you into emergency surgery." I piped up real quick. They put me on oxygen and got me up on all fours since I couldn't get there on my own completely with the epidural. I had had 4 major contractions all in a row and he didn't have any recovery time to raise his heart rate. I prayed so hard that his heart rate wold come back up and that everything would be okay. After a few minutes, it finally did, but that would not be the last time they would have to move me around to get his heart rate back up. They kept me on oxygen the majority of the time and I would breath deeper as I would feel the pressure from my contractions to help get him more oxygen so he could handle the contractions.
The nurses didn't want to break my water because it would put more pressure on the baby, I wanted my water to break naturally so I was perfectly fine with that. I was at a ten not long after but wanted to wait until I felt the urge to push. Jordanna came in to be with me and get updated with the nurses. Suddenly I had a different urge, the urge to throw up. I was regretting the hamburger and french fries I had eaten earlier. Rowdy went out to talk with our family and Jordanna stayed with me, feeding me ice chips. At 7:30am Dr. Johnson, the doctor who was working that shift, not my doctor, came in and starting talking about getting things going. "Lets break your water and get this show on the road." "I don't want to break my water" I said. They checked me and noticed that my bag of waters was partially hanging out of me. Dr. Johnson continued trying to convince me that breaking my water would get my labor going. I was thoroughly annoyed and Jordanna was sticking up for me, had he not read my chart? Breaking my water was not an option for the safety of my baby and because I'm the mom and I said no. He had just started his shift, I was his first patient and already he was trying to rush me. He was not happy with my response of not breaking my water, and me telling him I had been at a ten for a while, I was just waiting for the urge to push. I told him I wanted to wait another 30 minutes before I made any decisions. "Fine" was his response and he walked out.
He came back at 8am and asked that I try to push, I told him I would push after I threw up again because I felt nauseous. The nurse asked if I wanted zofran to help, so I got some of that and was ready to go. We got everyone in the room, Rowdy, Lacey, Jordanna, both my parents and Karen were there, Rowdy's parents decided to wait out in the waiting room instead of coming in. Dr. Johnson was already starting to tick people off, as everyone filed in for the birth my mom whispered, "Just warning you, the doctor's an ass". He was very rude and condescending to everyone, but I tried to ignore it and get ready for my baby boy to arrive. I started to push at 8:15am and he was crowning after the first push. I could feel the pressure of my contractions, so I knew when to push and how to push, the epidural was perfect because I was only numb from the pain, but not from any pressure, so I knew what to do and when to do it to get my baby out. Four pushes total and he was born at 8:29am. The cool thing was our son was born still in his bag of water, which is pretty rare apparently.
Everyone was in aw, I was bawling because I was so overwhelmed with emotion and joy. Rowdy was crying and we were all thrilled. They put him on my chest and he cried and cried. I held him for an hour before they took his measurements. 8lbs 5oz 21.5 inches long. He had a head full of hair too and was absolutely perfect. Visitors came and went as we enjoyed our new baby boy. We finally decided we should choose a name for him around 8:30pm that night. We went to the hospital with 5 names. Names had been nothing but a fight for Rowdy and I but now that our son was born, we both were more than willing to let the other person name him. We were in a blissful heaven. Rowdy asked me about the name Tyson, this was not a name we had previously discussed. I liked it so we decided to put Tyson, Hayden and Blake in the hat and to draw one. I drew Blake and that was his name. I had a feeling the last month that Blake would be his name, but I didn't want to tell Rowdy because I didn't want to persuade him one way or the other. Guess my feeling was right.
Rowdy fell in love with him instantly just as I did. His daddy instincts took over and he was a natural. I fell even more in love with Rowdy as I watched him tend to our son and cuddle and rock him. Those were some of the best moments I have experienced, ever. Now, Rowdy still is just as active in wanting to take care of Blake as I am. When he gets home from work, he holds him, changes him and when it's time for bed, he feeds him a bottle after I feed him and puts him to bed every night. Blake sleeps pretty well at night, giving me about a 5hr stint of sleep before waking up for a feeding, and then goes back to sleep for another 3 hrs before wanting to be up for a bit. His hair is so soft and long and he LOVES baths. He hated the sponge baths, but now that we can submerge him, he just hangs out and relaxes with his foot hanging over the hammock in the tub.
He also is fascinated with the TV, just last night he and Rowdy were both glued to the game. I saw a glimmer of my future in that moment. Blake got down to 7lbs 11 oz, but his two week check up is tomorrow and we will know how much he's gained. He eats like a man child at night, literally, he eats about 8oz just before bedtime. Yet, he is skinny as can be in his little waist. We have to overlap the diaper straps on both sides just to keep it on. He loves to suck on his hands and have his hands up by his face and if the sun is shining through the window in his eyes, he will put his arm over his eyes so he can sleep better. It is adorable. He has the cutest cry and makes adorable faces when he sleeps and when he cries. We are so in love with our little boy and he is loved incredibly so by all his family that constantly want to see him and hold him.
I was thinking yesterday, nothing has really gone to plan. My labor was very different than I had planned with not going into labor anywhere near my due date, he was 13 days late. Needing cervidil, not having a natural childbirth, breast feeding was a huge challenge because Blake was tongue tied so he had to get his frenulum cut (now it' going great), we started bottle feeding with pumped milk much sooner than I wanted and I gave in to the pacifier. But, everything has turned out just fine, and I think I was meant to learn that just because things do not go my way, does not mean I fail and that things won't work out just fine in the end. I didn't feel like a failure for getting an epidural, and I thought I would have, but honestly, I went 6 hrs in hard labor without it and tried by best, I would not have survived another 5 hrs. We are so in love with our son and I look forward to the years ahead of raising him.
Both glued to the football game
New Years Eve
Kisses at Midnight