December Time

So Rowdy and I had Christmas early with my family because we are going to be in South Carolina over Christmas with his family. We had the twins so we packed everyone in the car along with all the presents and went to Grandma Iris' house for Nona Amilia's Pizza and gifts. Rowdy and I got the kids coloring stuff, holographic puzzles, glow balls, clothes and a bike that hooks up to the T.V. (exercise video game) and my mom got the twins Pillow Pets, which was by far the biggest hit. They have been wanting those thing for MONTHS, and now they have them. They take them everywhere, i'm sure they would meander their way into school if I would let them lol. All in all it was a good night, the kids had fun, we had fun. I'm lucky to have the job that I do because it doesn't feel like a job, it feels like my own little surrogate family.

 A couple days later Johnny had his testing for his green belt and with the help and patience of Rowdy, he passed!!!

That same night we went and watched the boats with lights, the kids LOVED it and so did we. They had a blast and it was great to see how comfortable they were with my parents and Rowdy and I all together in a place they had never been before.

Now Rowdy and I are off to South Carolina for Christmas, so more posts to come!!!

Day 9

Here's a picture of the twins and I when we went to the water fountains at the library. They had a lot of fun but Jackie's front tooth became loose after that trip because she and another boy went through the fountain at the same time and smacked heads, the other kids poor cheek had her teeth marks in it, but all was well at the end of the day because we got ice cream and went and watched Rowdy's company softball game.

Day 8

Things like this make me angry and sad, Hate; Be it religious, racial, sex etc.

Day 7

I couldn't decide whether to put up pictures of my family, babies, church stuff or friends so I decided on this because to me, it encompasses all of those things, because without Christ and his love none of those would be possible.

Starting Over

Okay, over a month ago I was starting to go on a "get my booty back into shape" kick, and then life happened and I had to put it to a halt. So, now that things are settled a bit I'm thinking about getting back onto the bandwagon. Although the holidays are posing a challenge with lots of delicious home cooked goods that have little nutritional value and are generally high in calories (as most comfort food does), I'm going to try to be very disciplined with my eating and working out and also finish my "Eat to Live" book which so far has been very inspiring and informative, I would recommend it to anyone even if you are not on a "lose weight" kick.

We (Rowdy, his family and I) are going to South Carolina for Christmas and we are taking our engagement pictures there, I will definitely not be at my goal by then, or probably anywhere near close, but I'm going to try and kick my own butt so that I can look halfway decent in my engagement pictures lol. I'm not going to lie, this is very hard because not only does my mom cook and cater but my future mother-in-law cooks wonderfully as well, and of course, neither are very health conscious. I don't know how to get around this when dinner is made and there is nothing "healthy" to eat...

Day 6

Yes... This IS Bethany Joy Galeotti

Day 5

Favorite Quote:
This is VERY hard for me.... I LOVE quotes, I will buy books specifically for quotes. So I can't pick one.

Taylor's (just a few):

• “To love is to risk not being loved in return. To hope is to risk pain. To try is to risk failure, but risk must be taken because the greatest hazard in life is to risk nothing.”
• "It doesn't matter where you've been, it only matters where you're going.
• "In my opinion the best thing you can do is find a person who loves you for exactly who you are. Good mood, bad mood, ugly, pretty, handsome, what have you, the right person will still think the sun shines outta your ass. That's the kinda person worth sticking with."
• "Be the type of woman that, when your feet hit the floor every morning, the devil says: 'Oh crap, she's up.
• "When you feel alone, just look at the spaces between your fingers, remember that in those spaces you can see my fingers locked with yours forever."

Rowdy's: "It's is better to have tried and failed, then to have never tried at all."

Day 4

It should not be hard to guess who's is who's.....

Day 3

Mine

                                                                         

                                                                           Rowdy's

Day 2

Our favorite movie.... well that definitely cannot be narrowed down to just two (his and mine) because we L-O-V-E movies, like seriously.

For me, the two I would pick today would be:

For Rowdy, he has so many I cannot even count, so I just chose two on that never ending list:

Day 1

So I've seen this on a few blogs lately and thought, "why not?"

DAY 1: Recent pict of you and 15 interesting facts about yourself!

Facts:

1) I am a full time nanny to 5 yr old boy/girl twins! And a full time student at PSU

2) We L-O-V-E Jamba Juice

3) I sing, Rowdy cannot... but he likes to =)

4) Rowdy is going to school to be a Lawyer

5) I like to work out

6) Rowdy's first love is not me, indeed it is sports.

7) We are engaged!!!!

8) Rowdy does not like vegetables, unless it is corn or potatoes

9) We are getting married July 9th!

10) We both each have 3 nephews, 3+3=6 nephews between both of us!!!

11) I like to work out and eat healthy, not sure how Rowdy and I will survive once we are married as far as cooking goes bc we do not like very many of the same thing.

12) Our favorite color is ORANGE

13) We both have family from the South

14) Rowdy is OBSESSED with OSU

15) I like University of Oregon

• Day 01 — Recent picture of you and 15 interesting facts about yourself

• Day 02 — Your favorite movie

• Day 03 — Your favorite television program

• Day 04 — Your favorite book

• Day 05 — Your favorite quote

• Day 06 — A photo of you and your friends

• Day 07 — A photo that makes you happy

• Day 08 — A photo that makes you angry/sad

• Day 09 — A photo you took

• Day 10 — A photo of you taken over ten years ago

• Day 11 — A photo of you taken recently
• Day 12 — A picture of someone/something that has the biggest impact on you

• Day 13 — A picture of somewhere you've been to

• Day 14 — What I would find in your bag

• Day 15 — Your favorite song

• Day 16 — A song that makes you cry (or nearly)

• Day 17 — Put you ipod on shuffle: first 10 songs that play

• Day 18 — Plans/dreams/goals you have

• Day 19 — Your nicknames and reasons behind them

• Day 20 — A picture of you and your family taken recently

• Day 21 — A recipe

• Day 22 — The story behind your blog's name

• Day 23 — A YouTube video

• Day 24 — Something you crave often

• Day 25 — Your day, in great detail

• Day 26 — Your week, in great detail

• Day 27 — This month, in great detail

• Day 28 — This year, in great detail

• Day 29 — Hopes, dreams and plans for the next 365 days

• Day 30 — What you have learned in the last 30 days

The House That Built Me

         So, the past few weeks have been a little.... insane. My diet idea kinda went by the wayside these past couple weeks because school has been a crapper lately and we moved. We lost our house and had 12 days to be out, but by the time I found out, we had only 9 days. Long story short, it was a lot of packing, a lot of help from our dear friends and a ton of tears. I've lived in that house for nearly 20 years, and I was devastated to see it be taken away from me because the bank decided to recant their deal with my parents at the last minute. The house I planned taking my own children to to see their grandparents is no longer ours to call home, but it will always be my home. I miss it already, no more bonfires out back or weeding the front yard (which by the way, I hated doing but now i'll miss it). No more going through the back gate to see my life long neighbors, the Gary's. No more walking into the "green room" Christmas morning and flashing back to when my brother, Levi and I slept under the fooseball table in hopes of catching Santa (we were not successful in that endeavor). My kids will never build the forts in the backyard, my backyard, like I did growing up and they will never see the hand prints in the driveway that my brother and I made years ago with my dad when we poured more concrete to expand the driveway. Everyone keeps telling me it will be a good thing and that everything will be okay, and even though I'm sure things will pan out fine, it doesn't make the pain any less.
        We are now currently living in a three bedroom apartment for the time being because of short notice. It is by no means my favorite place, and it does not feel like home to me. As I walk through the front door (that does not shut properly) I see mounds of boxes filled with 20 years of my life and memories from my house. 20 years, manically thrown into boxes so we could be out in time for the bank to let our house just sit there, empty. My whole life I've been told that I am so caring and sweet, that I'm genuine and that I am a positive person, and even though I am trying my darndest to be that so that my parents and my brother don't have to worry about it, inside, I can't help but be selfish and cry because I am sad and angry and devastated. People say it is "just a house", made from wood and concrete just like any other house is, but it's the house that I grew up in, where I learned to ride my bike on two wheels and roller blade with my dad, until he was going too fast one time and had to superman himself into the neighbors yard to stop.
        I have never been good with change, especially change I didn't see coming. I taught myself how to play the piano there when I was just five and I would always help my mom make cookies, and when she wasn't looking I would stick my finger into the butter where the spoonful of sugar had dipped into it and stick it in my mouth. It's the place that when I was in high school, Levi and Robbie thought they would try drinking raw eggs and both spit it into the kitchen blinds, attempting to get to the sink because it was so disgusting. It's the place I brought all my boyfriends home to meet my family, and where my future husband and I have spent countless hours bonding and reconnecting at the beginning of our relationship. I'm going to miss my room where I have prayed daily and found solace and comfort during difficult times and have also figured out the rest of my life and who I should be with.
        Sure, in 7.5 months I would have been moving out anyway, but my children will never have the opportunity to enjoy that house like I did growing up, just like I did at my grandparents' house, where my dad and mom grew up their whole lives. I guess one could say, after reading this, that I am a sentimental type, to the core. Rowdy has been great through all of this, I swear the second the tears start to flow, he's right on it trying to comfort and hold me, in that moment, it's about me, and my pain and feelings. I feel so selfish writing that, but in all honesty, it's how I've been feeling these past couple weeks. I'm not a crier, anyone can tell you that, but I have been nothing but a fountain of tears over my house. Last Sunday Rowdy and I were driving back from church and we passed my house and the song, "The House That Built Me" came on the radio, then came the water works. It is the perfect song in this moment of my life. I cannot change my circumstances, the only thing I can change is my attitude, but this has been a difficult thing for me to overcome, and for the time being, I'm doing it for the people that have to be around me all the time, I'm hoping I can do it for myself soon at some point. I will miss it and do miss it dearly and it has only been officially one day since we signed it over. I will look back on my childhood with fond memories of my home because it is indeed, the house the built me.

        On a brighter note, since all blogs should be left with a happy thought, fall term is almost over and I can honestly say, I CANNOT wait to take different classes, because lets face it, Computer Science and Stats just aren't my areas of expertise. Rowdy and I also changed our date to July 9th, 2011, so a little under 8 months and we will be getting married! Also, my childhood friend, Tiffany Bleak-Johansen has started her own business called "Tippy Toppers", and it is the cutest thing ever! (I have a button link for it on my page, seriously, check it out) I can't wait to have kids so they can sport her adorable little hats! She is an amazing person to me, she has overcome so much in the last five years, she just inspires me to be better. Even though I have lost my home, it is not the worst thing that could ever happen to me, and if Tiff can get to where she is now, it gives me the hope that I can get there too. Also, for Christmas, I am going back with Rowdy and my soon-to-be in-laws to South Carolina to visit his sister and her husband and nephews, and I am VERY excited! We are also taking our engagement pics there, and I am very excited to see the scenery. My first real time on the east coast (outside of the airport)!! We are also going up to Seattle for Thanksgiving with my dad's side of the family at my cousin, Tina's new house. It will be fun and I am looking forward to seeing everyone. So that's an update on my crazy life the last few weeks and all its craziness. More to come, I'm sure of it.


I know they say you can’t go home again
I just had to come back one last time
Ma’am I know you don’t know me from Adam
But these handprints on the front steps are mine

Up those stairs in that little back bedroom
Is where I did my homework and I learned to play piano
I bet you didn’t know under that live oak
My favorite cat is buried in the yard

I thought if I could touch this place or feel it
This brokenness inside me might start healing
Out here it’s like I’m someone else
I thought that maybe I could find myself
If I could walk around I swear I’ll leave
Won’t take nothing but a memory
From the house that built me

Mama cut out pictures of houses for years
From Better Homes and Gardens magazine
Plans were drawn and concrete poured
Nail by nail and board by board
Daddy gave life to mama’s dream

I thought if I could touch this place or feel it
This brokenness inside me might start healing
Out here it’s like I’m someone else
I thought that maybe I could find myself
If I could walk around in I swear I’ll leave
Won’t take nothing but a memory
From the house that built me

You leave home and you move on and you do the best you can
I got lost in this old world and forgot who I am

I thought if I could touch this place or feel it
This brokenness inside me might start healing
Out here it’s like I’m someone else
I thought that maybe I could find myself
If I walk around I swear I’ll leave
Won’t take nothing but a memory
From the house that built me
  

"Running Off the Flab"-Gen Toki

So I've decided that it's time, time to get my big booty in shape. Since I have transferred home from Linfield, I have gained 15lbs!!!!! Although I don't necessarily look like I've gained that much, I have. I've been reading an old friends' blog, "Running Off the Flab" and have been inspired to get back to being healthy. I have a wedding coming up in 9 months along with the rest of my life.. imagine that! So, with exercise, eating healthy and a TON of discipline, I'm hoping to not only get back to my old weight, but to lose an extra 2-5lbs ON TOP of my 15lbs. My goal is to get down to 128lbs by March-ish (if you do some simple math you can probably figure out about how much I'm weighing now...). I'm not entirely sure how I'm going to do this as far as details go, so a little advice would be MUCH appreciated =) I figure if two of my friends that have recently had babies can get down to their old size... there should be nothing stopping me, right? I LOVE ice cream, so I can possibly start to replace that with chocolate slim fasts when I'm having a craving. No more Frenchfries, oh how I crave those late at night! I need to buy some brown rice and eat lots of raw veggies (which luckily I love) and drink a crap ton of H2O. Another downfall, I love carby foods, like homemade bread and noodles. I'm trying to figure out a way to motivate myself to workout at home when I have the twins, because lets face it, motherhood takes a lot of energy out of you, and once it's their bedtime, you definitely feel like it's yours too. And they are up by 7am and sometimes we are up at 530am on Tues/Thurs when I have school early. So, if any of my readers have any good tips, anything at all, please feel free to send them my way! I don't want to do a crash diet or a "specialty" diet, the point of being healthy is making "life" changes, things that I can do for the rest of my life, not just a few month period. So "stay tuned" as they say for more updates on my life, the twins, wedding plans as well as my new adventure to being fit, again.

Cooky for Coooookies!!

So I had the twins for the weekend and we decided to make some Halloween cookies =) They also colored some Halloween pictures my mom had bought them. We also went to church, as usual, and the kids got their parts in the Sunday school annual program, they were so excited! They always ask me when they can speak in the microphone like the other kids and now they get to! They are getting very excited about Halloween. They're just bummed it's still three weeks away lol. Jackie will be a witch and Johnny is going to be a SWAT guy. His costume comes with makeshift handcuffs and if you let your mind wander just a tad, you can probably guess that one of them has already gotten stuck in them, and yes, Jackie has =) so those got put away quickly lol. They also played at Rowdy's parent's house this weekend in their matching Gator shirts. They loved all the new toys and things to do.We watched football and did some wedding stuff. The twins are quickly being introduced into the land of serious sports action. Every time someone scores or makes a great tackle Lacey, Rowdy and my future father-in-law, Tony all scream and yell, and every time the kids jump haha, its cute, they just look at everyone like they're nuts and go back to playing, someday they will not even care or just join in. 

As trying as it can be, I love my nanny job. I love that I can take them to my house and my in-laws and that they are in-love with Rowdy. Jackie just thinks he's so cute, she's infatuated with him and Johnny loves his guy time with him, "No girls allowed Jackie!". I feel like the twins and their mom Kaye are another part of my family, and I was always hoping for that when I took this "job". It's also great prep for myself and Rowdy, when he comes over, for when we have kids. I'll be a pro at raising kids by then.... not lol I don't think that's ever attainable. But either way, i'm learning so much from these two little (well not so little now, they outgrow an outfit every time they put one on, I swear!) five year olds. I love reaping the rewards of little things. When they crack jokes or do something and don't even realize how funny they are. When they ask me loaded religious questions or questions about lava or "laba" as they call it or butterflies "flutterbys" lol so cute. I dunno, even when school isn't going how I wish it would (not enjoying the PSU transfer), i'm grateful that I have two jobs, one of which I get to come home to my two little twins and color with them or when I'm laying down on the bed they crawl in with me and watch TV as Jackie twirls my hair in her fingers, oh life precious little moments and I love them. I'm grateful for my family and my amazing friends, my fiance and the church. I have a new perspective on life as since mine has changed so drastically in the last year and I am trying to be more grateful for the endless blessings that I am given each and every day.

                                          Mixing the orange dough

                                          Precooked

                                          Final product!

 Decorations

There Once was a girl... and a boy

         So for those of you that do not know about how Rowdy and I came to be, let me fill you in. For starters, Rowdy and I have known each other and grown up together since I was 6 years old. Had some of the same friends growing up and hung out sometimes in high school. Flash forward a few years to November 2009, I came home for Thanksgiving weekend. Rowdy had been home from his mission for a couple months now and I had not seen him. He asked if I wanted to go get lunch sometime, so we did at our favorite restaurant, Red Robin. We talked and then parted ways and never thought about anything further, little did I know there was a greater plan that we were both VERY unaware of for the future. December rolled around and I was home again from school for Christmas and we started to hangout as friends. The big joke was that my mom was paying him to hangout with me lol. We went Christmas shopping together and hung out watching movies. We started to become inseparable. 


          I was in a relationship with Brendan, a guy some of you may know. Things were not going well, it was a constant struggle to make things go smoothly for a matter of minutes. I started to have feelings for Rowdy and it seemed to be reciprocated on his end as well. I decided to take a leap of faith and pray about it. Yes, pray. I was not an active member in the church that I grew up in at the time, so praying about something like this seemed a little foreign to me at the time. I decided to ask God if I should leave Brendan and start to date Rowdy. As I began my prayer, instead of asking my original question, I asked "Am I supposed to marry Rowdy?" My Body froze as I realize what had just come out of my mouth and it was no more than a few milliseconds later that I had gotten this OVERWHELMING feeling; my heart became very warm and I started to cry, uncontrollably, I knew I was going to be with this boy that I had grown up with almost my entire life. 


           I got out of bed and ran into my parents room, mind you it was about 3am. My mom woke up and asked why I was crying and I flat out told her, "I'm supposed to marry Rowdy". She was a little surprised, but happy and then asked why I was crying, if it was because I was happy or upset. It was because I was happy but also very scared because I NEVER thought this would ever happen to me. I went back to bed that night but could not fall asleep. Rowdy and I still hung out when things started to change, we started to act different, like a couple but without the physical attachment, and it all happened over night. He went to my family Christmas party and it all went very smoothly, but my very drunk uncle asked me, "Taylor, this your guy here?" It was a little awkward for me to answer but the night went well. 


           The next day I did what I felt was right and broke up with Brendan. Rowdy came over for support and was very patient through all my tears, even though I knew what I was doing what the right thing, I still felt bad for hurting someone I had been with for so long and had invested so much of my time and emotions into. It was from then on that Rowdy and I were never apart it seemed. He would come over early in the morning until about 2am and we would just hangout and talk and if we weren't together we would text all night, sometimes until 5am!


          Then a day or so before new years my brother Levi, his girl friend at the time, Heather and I all drove up to Seattle to see my brother, his wife and my nephew Micah. Rowdy was anxious all day for me to come home as he was constantly texting, asking when I would be home. My mom called and said we should head home early because a snow storm was coming in. Well, we didn't leave soon enough because the three hour drive to Seattle took over 8 hours to get home. While we were all sitting, stuck in snow traffic, just inching along, Rowdy and I were texting back and forth when he told me he thought he was falling in love with me. That stopped me in my tracks, how on earth could this be happening to me I thought. He told me he didn't want anyone else but me and he would wait as long as it took. I knew there was no going back now.


          New years Eve rolled around and that's when it became "official", we were together. I went back to Linfield for a month and a half, when just after Valentine's I decided that I needed to be home in order to make the changes I really wanted to make in my life. So, two weeks into the new semester I packed up all my stuff and said goodbye to the only college life I knew and most of my friends that I loved and still love so dearly. As hard as it was and as much as I may miss it at times, I know it was the right thing for me to do. I never would be where I am now and who I am now had I not made the change and decision to do so.


         Rowdy and I knew within a matter of weeks that we were supposed to be together on a more "permanent" basis. Two days after we started dating there was already a rumor that we were engaged, haha wow. I also later found out that back in September, my dad went up to Rowdy, jokingly, and told him "you can date my daughter, heck you can marry her", little did anyone know that would become Rowdy's and my fate. Rowdy and I have been through our ups and downs, heartaches and pains together, but we have survived all but death it seems thus far. Now, we are embarking on an entirely new life together, a life that will be filled with much happiness but many trials along the way. We have family and friends that love and support us, a church and a God to help guide us as well.

        I thank God everyday for giving me another chance at a better life, a life that may not always be perfect and happy, but always filled with hope, love and faith. I also thank God for sending me the Love of my life, my family and future in-laws and friends that love and support my decisions. I'm grateful to be a member of a church that supports me and loves me and all of God's children. I realize now as I look back on my life, how blessed I am and I cannot wait to begin this new life with my fiance, Rowdy Coakley.

"She said 'yes' he said 'Wow', she said 'when' he said 'how about July 9th!"

         It's official, we are engaged!!!! Rowdy proposed September 30th in the most romantic way possible. Rowdy decided to trick me a little and take me "ring shopping" (we didn't get anything, apparently he bought the ring a while ago in South Carolina). Afterwards we drove home and there was a scrapbook wrapped in a bow on the couch. It was pictures and notes from some close friends and family, it was all so sweet it made me cry! Rowdy's page was the last and it was adorable. He said in it that he was going to propose someday, he was just waiting for the right time. Little did I know that time was only ten minutes away. He got up after I read through it all and went to "grab something for his mom". Moments later I got a text saying to go out onto the deck.

         I walked outside to see Rowdy waiting for me on a pathway of twinkle lights, candles, rose petals and chocolate kisses. It formed into a heart and there was a chair at the top with a night stand next to it with 21 red roses in it. "Only Fools Rush In" was playing in the background. Rowdy walked me over to the chair and sat me down and then he proceeded to get down on one knee. I was SHAKING!!! Rowdy told me how much he loved me and how he wanted to spend the rest of eternity with me. He pulled out a ring from under the chair (which I had no idea had happened, i was so in the moment I thought he pulled it out of thin air lol) and lifted my left hand and asked, "Taylor, will you marry me?" and put the ring on my finger!!!! 

       Of course I said yes and got up to kiss him. He then pulled a rose from the vase and asked "Taylor, will you accept this rose" haha too cute! Then we danced to the rest of the song, "You look Wonderful Tonight" and then called and text everyone we knew to share the news! Not long after my mom comes running out all excited and crying (happy tears of course). It was all so surreal. I was shaking like a leaf haha Tasha and Lacey were able to take pics and film the entire thing, which I'm elated about because I can re-watch that moment for the rest of my life, as can my children.


        I feel blessed to have found the man I want to spend forever with and wants to spend it with me. He loves me for all my strengths and weaknesses and imperfections. He forgives me for my faults and walks with me through my trials. He has the desire to protect me and take care of me, to be the father of my children. He loves my family and I love his. We have similar goals and the same faith in God. I never thought that I would ever be this happy with someone I never even saw coming. A year ago, I would have never thought this would be me, and I don't think anyone else would either. It is so true when they say "It happens when you least expect it". Rowdy blindsided me completely, but it's the best surprise in my life yet.